It’s easier for me to write about public policy issues than to self-disclose. I don’t suppose that’s a huge shock to anyone reading this. Nevertheless, the whole idea of starting this blog was to educate myself, and you as well, about this health issue I’m having. I realize I’ve been deflecting my focus away from my diagnosis by spending a great deal of time research and tsk-tsking about the problems in the Canadian health care system.

Let me just set the record straight on this for the time being: while the Canadian system may not be perfect, it is one hell of a lot better than anything I ever had in the USA since I outgrew my coverage on my dad’s policy. That was about 30 years ago. In spite of the fact that I’ve always worked, I’ve never in my life had consistent or thorough health screenings. That’s one of the reasons I’m having this problem now.

Okay, moving on.

I suppose I’m casting about looking for other things to write about because this is a little scary–because even if it isn’t now, it might someday be cancerous. Also, it’s a “female problem” and I was raised, as were many of us, that we don’t talk about these things in general conversation. There is blood involved and I suppose I retain the remnants of some long-standing traditional taboo on the subject.

My mother didn’t talk about it any more than she absolutely had to. She gave me “the talk” in purely clinical terms. She have me a book from the doctor’s office that covered the mechanics of sexual intercourse as well as menstruation. She gave me some “tips” on hygiene when it started, brought home the box of sanitary pads and once, when I forget my toilet paper wrapped “discard” on the edge of the bathroom sink, she raised holy hell with me. Beyond that, silence.

The other girls sat around and talked about their periods; I don’t think I was ever very comfortable with that. Maybe with a couple close friends but it didn’t come easily.

Now here I am, on the damned Internet blabbing about my uterus, blood, and abnormal cells. I’m doing this because I think it’s important, not because it’s easy. I think it’s important because nothing good comes from silence.